Esther Ama Morkor
Let the Journey Begin
Listening as the doctor tried to pump hope back into her, she couldn’t help but see the hopelessness of it all. The die was rolled. Her own body was failing her. Feeling numb, her mind raced back to a few days ago when she first detected the hard mass in her breast; her heart, pumping like mad. She had felt it again, willing it to go away, praying that it was just one of the tissues in her breast, but when she touched it again, it was there, a mass more solid than her breast tissues.
At the Cocoa Clinic, the lump was removed and sent to the lab for a biopsy. So, there she sat in front of the doctor being told that the lump was cancerous and that her breast had to be removed.
One day, while at a prayer meeting, a prophecy came clearly to her, “This is not unto death, but for My own glorification.”
“The word of God had come and I had to hold on to it, but holding on was not easy.”
The prophecy brought some comfort, but as she sat down to eat the following morning, a small voice whispered in her ears, “What makes you think that you will survive this? How special are you from all the other people who have died? “Putting the tea cup back on the saucer, her tongue dried out again.
“That is when the real battle actually begins. That is, the spiritual battle. As soon as I tried to be strong, the negative thoughts crept in. But once I accepted God’s word that I was not going to die, I told myself that I was going to live to the glory of God.”
Esther had been warned about the effects of chemotherapy, but nothing prepared her for the reality of it. So when one day, while combing her hair, large clumps of hair began falling from her head, she felt terrified. Coupled with this was the loss of appetite, the sore mouth and throat, the vomiting, the consistent tiredness, her gnarled, discoloured nails, her ashy skin, and the sheer weight loss. The effects of chemotherapy took their toll on her. There were days when she felt she would not live to see the next day.
“It was a real battle. One minute you feel fine, you are not going to die, and the next minute you think you don’t have the will and you are going to die.”
It helped that her children were all away in boarding school. So far, she had succeeded in keeping the secret from them, and she thought she was doing a good job of distancing herself from them. Until one day, while in her bathroom, the door opened and who walked in but her son, Yooku, leaving her feeling very stunned.